Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Time to Get REAL! Is It Hard for You to Say No?

It is for me sometimes. In fact, 2012 has started with some real tough lessons for me, including what happens when life burn-out hits you front and center. With my health and energy levels at an all time low, I discovered I had been over-giving, over-working, and over-yes-ing. That means saying yes to more than I really wanted to say yes to, and giving more time and importance to what others want and need.

Author and Coach Cheryl Richardson talks about only saying yes to her ‘absolute yes’ list. Similar to the message we share in our Get Up Girl 9 Week program, she suggests putting our self-care above anything else—say no unless it's an absolute yes. The goal is to spend our time and energy on things that bring us joy and make decisions based on what we want instead of what others want. When we don't set boundaries and take care of ourselves, our health and well-being are at stake.

It might sound selfish to some (I know I have that voice in my head at times from past limiting beliefs), but how well can we really take care of others if we are constantly feeling depleted and running on empty? Not only will our health and well-being be affected, but it also becomes more difficult to experience true happiness and fulfillment.

So let’s get real. What is YOUR ABSOLUTE YES LIST?
Here are a few questions inspired by Cheryl Richardson.

Ask yourself:

1. What needs your attention at this time in your life?

2. Think in terms of the next 3 months, not the next year. What needs your attention: Your marriage, financial, health, your physical and emotional heath? Maybe you need to find a babysitter to care for your child so you can have time for yourself each week. What are the most pressing areas right now?

More examples: Spiritual well-being, time with friends, school, work,
volunteering, finances, household chores, home repair, etc.

3. Once you've made your list above, pick the top five priorities.


Does your list need to be reordered?

Cheryl recommends placing yourself at Number 1. Placing yourself at the top may be hard, but ask yourself, "How am I going to take care of others if I am burnt out?" Remember, this is about you. This Is Your Absolute Yes List.

Daily Reminder:  Once your list is complete, print it out and place it where you will see it throughout the day—the bathroom mirror, the dashboard of your car, your computer monitor, etc. This will assist you in staying on track with your list.

by Margalit Ward
 
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